This is so beautiful. (click the link below) It makes me cry. I know part of it is because I am so homesick right now I am dreaming in orange and brown and gold. But even more I cry because I am so desperate for my life to be characterized by this - a real sacrifice to the Lord for his service. Not a proud, verbal intention that really hides a lot of self effort and guardedness and busy-ness. I want to dawdle (is that a word?) in the Lord's service - like my children do when we take walks. I get so frustrated because it takes us FOR-EVER! to get anywhere. They have to pick up everything. Touch everything.Stop and stare at everything. I should love that...and deep down I do. But the practical thinker in me says, "If we want to get to the park and have our picnic and read our books and run around before nap time and enjoy it than WE NEED TO HURRY UP! WHY ARE YOU SPENDING SO MUCH TIME ENJOYING THE WALK UP THERE! GOOD GRIEF!" Maybe practical, but clearly not logical. But, what do they care? They just enjoy being with me and each other and trust that everything is all right as long as I am near by and so they can be about everything around them. I don't always really trust that everything is all right with the Lord near and so I busy myself making it all right and then find myself busy and tired.
My prayer this October is to find the beauty in dying...to myself.
1 comment:
As you read the gospels, you find that Christ always did the Father's will, but he was never in a hurry and always accepting of interruptions or delays. Martha did well, but Mary did better. Be blessed - enjoy and profit from the "incidentals" along the way of serving Christ.
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